Ariangela

The movie "The Visitor" touched me alot. I had a similar experience of how Zenaib felt when got Tariq got arrested.

As soon as I saw the scene of Tariq's arrest it reminded me of something i went through. One day I was heading home

from a doctor's appointment with my cousin and my daughter Arianna. When we got to the train station, he passed his

metrocard and then entered through the emergency exit door, with Arianna since she was in a stroller. Two men came out

with their badges and arrested him. They told me that he would be released later that night. They didn't look up to see if he

had any warrants, which I later learned was the only reason they could arrest you on the spot. They just took him in. I was

heartbroken. I couldn't do anything especially with Arianna next to me. They did let him go later that night and said it was all

a misunderstanding. I was furious that they took him in without any explanations and all they said was "it was a

misunderstanding". We knew how unfair the legal system could be. When I saw the pain Tariq's eyes, it reminded me of my

cousin's eyes. Besides that experience Zenaib, Tariq and I share, the rest of the movie just touched me even though I never

had to go through what they went through. I felt their pain. When Zenaib cried because Tariq was deported, I felt so much

anger and wanted to say what was on my mind, as repulsive as it was, to the people who deported him. I think this movie,

touched many others, like it has touched me.

             Media promotes an unhealthy self image. Media objecties women in countless ways. For those women who have been sexually abused, the unhealthy self-image grows even more. Once a woman has been through that bad experience they tend to lock up all their emotions instead of expressing themselves. Media encourages this behavior. As seen in most movies or heard in most songs, the best way to deal with this problem is through drugs or alcohol. They feel futile due to that sinister event, but these addictions bring them comfort.

             As stated in the article "Two Ways A Woman Can Get Hurt" by Kilbourne, when refering to abuse, "It hurts, does damage, and it sets up for addictions and self-destructive behavior. Many girls turn to food, alcohol, cigarettes, and other drugs in a misguided attempt to cope"(440).  It becomes blatant that these addictions, help them take the pain away. They see it as a way to escape the horrific event that they endured. Media keeps on promoting this "escape", knowing many will absorb it, therefore take it as their own. Unfortunatly this way of living, is common among most abused women, and cooperatively the numbers of this insidious addiction grow with it.

       My personal experience is one i never thought i would be in. At 18, i was pregnant with a set of baby girl twins on the way. From day one, the girls father didn't want to be involved. The five year relationship we had didn't matter to him. At first i was weak, and kept hoping he would come back to help me. At the end of my pregnancy he did come back,  but as the "convenient father". From that moment on, i engraved the idea on my mind that i would do it on my own. I never turned to him for anything. If he wanted to do anything at all that was up to him. I was indepedent and refused to depend on any guy, especially him for any type of help. It was very difficult.I struggled hard. I worked, went to school and still do. Unfortunatly i can say with little help from him. All that matters to me is that my girls have everything they need and will ever need and im very proud to say i did it on my own.

             The video clip "Slip of the Tongue", strongly expresses the view of a young woman's ethnicity and how the modern american culture, influences and shades ones ethnicity. She refuses to let "makeup" and others define who she is. she clearly states "cuz ill be damned if i ever let a european or american corperation tell me what my foundation should look like". She feels very strong about who she is and where she comes from. If anything that's what defines her. In the begining of the clip the guy blurts out "what is your ethnic makeup?". That only flames her believes. She ends up replying, "so what's my ethnic makeup?. I dont have any, because your ethnicity isn't something you could just makeup and as far as that shit my sisters put on their faces, that's not makeup thats make believe". She feels that all that makeup and all the other things that girls do to make them more beautiful in the eyes of society, isn't who they are. It's who they are pretending to be. It makes girls compete to be more beautiful then the next girl, when at the end of the day they are all the same.

            The message of the video clip, is not to let the society and culture around young woman shape who they are and who they will become. Alot of young people lose their ethncity and their culture somewhere between all the makeup, trying to look like the next person, and trying to be another person. They don't hold on to their values, to their background, to their past. They perfer to do what everyone else is doing. Yet everyone has a voice, everyone is different, and therefore every culture should be heard and should standout. That's who you are. That's what defines you.

            Throughout my teenage years, i moved around alot. I went to different schools. Yet somehow, everyone appeared the same to me. Everyone dressed the same, looked the same, ate the same, etc. Yet if you looked deep into everyones eyes, they were all different. They each had a different story that told you where they came from. That story was hidden behind all the things that made them "cool". I relate to this video clip. I too have the urge and want to share who i am, where i come from, and what makes me, me. Like the girl in the video clip, "I wear this foundation not upon my face, but within my soul". I believe everyone has this foundation. It just needs to come out. It needs to surpass all the other things blocking it. So that it may be heard.